Demystifying the Healer
My favourite definition of the word heal is; to make whole. Healing as a movement brings things together and unifies whatever it is that is separate from us. In truth, we are all healers.
As I mentioned in my biography, in 2012 my life was turned upside down. At age 24, my heart was broken for the first time and I didn’t know how to deal with the overwhelm of pain. I had come to a point where all of my old coping strategies were not working for me anymore and new words like co-dependent and meditation were beginning to catch my attention. Maybe some of you have the same coping strategies as I did. It’s so common to have a glass of wine at the end of the day to release stress, take medication to mask the pain in our bodies, or talk behind our peers back’s about the issues we have with them rather than face conflict head on with compassionate communication.
These are some of the typical things we all do to cope,created by the age-old tradition of sweeping our issues under the rug.
Don’t get me wrong - there is no judgement here - we are all human! Sometimes we need to do these things, and sometimes they are totally fun and innocent. I’m pointing at them because many of us reach a point where these strategies just stop working.
I’ve noticed over time that those who seek out a more holistic approach to health and wellness do so usually because they have reached a point of crisis. Not all people have to reach this point in their life, but I do feel that reaching this transformational point is becoming more and more common.
In our culture we learn how to cover up pain instead of taking the healing action; which is to pay attention to it... and lovingly if you can.
My favourite definition for the word heal is, to make whole. Healing as a mouvement brings things together and unifies whatever it is that is separate from us. In truth, we are all healers.
I have a group of younger friends who have made it trendy to inquire whether other humans in their network are the types of people that do their ‘self work’ or ‘inner work’. It seems to be becoming a new framework for determining the caliber of a person. My heart flutter’s when I see this type of mentality becoming trendy! So long as its guiding authority is coming from the heart, it feels like quite a magical thing.
Reaching this crisis point that I mentioned earlier is an indication that the old coping strategies we have been using to deal with our life issues are just not working for us any more. Metaphorically speaking, all of things that we have pushed out of sight and out of mind and into the closet, are bursting at the seams. At this point, there is nowhere else to go but inside of ourselves to start completing the cleaning out process.
The funny thing about it is, that no one really teaches us how to work with and understand all the unique pieces of who we are as we are growing up. So, it usually takes us to the point of a personal break down and/or an awakening before we realize that this 'paying attention to our inner world' and being curious about our authentic soul response to life, is even something we can pay attention to. In general we are not taught how to self reflect or to meditate at a young age.
When we were children, when we cried or were acting well…. childish, the common response we may have gotten was to “grow up”, or to “think of all the poor children in another country who didn't have the things that we had”. If you’re a boy, you are told to be tough and strong because boys don’t cry. And if you’re a girl, you get complimented when you act sweet and polite. Being guided to move away from our authentic body/mind/spirit response is commonplace at the moment in our culture. It's rare that we are taught how to regulate our emotions, to honour them as our compass, or to grow our personal will to the point where we can authentically integrate into society. Good news though, I have been a nanny for the past 10 years of my life, and so I know first first hand experience that things are totally changing. I think that we have a lot more emotional awareness now a day. There are tools and techniques for communication that honour emotions, and children are taught how to feel and name them. Some children that I know personally have even been taught to listen to their bodies to tell them what to eat. There is hope!
However, I’m talking to those of us who didn’t grow up being taught emotional awareness. I mentioned that I had a breakdown when I was 24. I say it because I want you to know that I don’t think it’s something to be ashamed of. But rather, it is an offering, and a doorway to an opportunity from sprit to open up to a more expanded version of who you already are. A version of you that honours not just your mental and physical aspects, (those pieces of us that are considered valuable in our current society), but our spiritual and emotional aspects as well.
Mother Teresa said, "The greatest disease in the West today is not TB or leprosy; it is being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for. We can cure physical diseases with medicine, but the only cure for loneliness, despair, and hopelessness is love. There are many in the world who are dying for a piece of bread but there are many more dying for a little love. The poverty in the West is a different kind of poverty -- it is not only a poverty of loneliness but also of spirituality. There's a hunger for love, as there is a hunger for God."
Another aspect to consider is that the emotional, physical, mental and spiritual pieces are interconnected. So when we have a physical illness it's worth looking at the emotional, metal and spiritual pieces as well as the physical. What would happen if our society began to really take a look at our personal health issues in this way? What if we stopped trying to separate ourselves from the illness? What would happen? I think it is an interesting thought to ponder on.
A healer invites you to own your illness, because through the courageous work of embracing it, we also acquire the power within to change the narrative and many times even the illness itself.
But to do so we must first loosen the grip of fear, and read what is inside of our inner files with courage and compassion. When we begin to look at ourselves from a more soul based lens we expand our potential and our effectiveness to recreate our own personal narrative. We become the architects of our own realities.
For me, a professional healer is someone who is walking this path themselves, and so then has the tools and capacity to support others. They do this by holding sacred space for your inner knowing to unfold. A healer is someone who will encourage you to open the scary bits within and let them integrate into your whole being. All of this is done while the healer stays attuned to your own readiness, and holds a safe container for you to process new information. A healer is someone that you can trust with the role of supporting you to open to your own power. Because again, we all have this innate capacity to access the healer within. It is common to feel a sort of terror when you begin to contemplate the shift into an awareness that takes ownership and looks within. And although it may feel like it at times, you won't die from this. And moving through the process does ultimately bring you to a place of more light, more understanding, more peace and more self love.
From there the journey of life becomes more and more, the joy ride we signed up for! Perhaps you found your way here out of curiosity, or maybe because of personal crisis, or bodily pain. No matter the reason I will ask you all the same question. Are you being called to enter a space of healing? Are you ready to take more of your personal power back and become conscious to more of who you already are? Trumpet sounds in the background ;) Are you ready to take action and connect to your own inner healer? If you are, or if you already have, I am grateful for your effort to create a better reality for yourself and those around you. I honour you and your journey, and hope these words support you in your passage through life.
Blessing and love,